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Updated: Feb 26, 2021

Self-control is a complex skill that develops over time and allows us to think through our actions before carrying them out.

Self-control may seem simple, but it’s really a complex skill and involves a large network within the brain called the Executive Network.

Housed across the frontal and parietal areas of the brain this network allows one to draw on past experience, make a comparison to the results of previous action and then decide on appropriate action for the present situation. This process involves impulse control, emotional control and motor control! Having self-control helps kids in all areas of life but is especially important when it comes to socialising. Being in control of their actions and reactions helps kids fit in and make friends. So what does self-control look like in every-day situations?

Waiting for things without throwing a tantrum. Anticipate what might happen if they do—or don’t—say something or take action.

Manage their anger or frustration without outbursts.

Keep their hands to themselves.

Set a goal and make a step-by-step plan for reaching it.

Think through how their behaviour affects others and make changes based on that thinking.

Without self-Control children may blurt out answers in class, burst into tears when teased gently by friends, grab things or touch without permission, cut in line without waiting their turn or interrupt conversations inappropriately.

While all children develop self-control at their own pace some may fall significantly behind their peers. This may point to underlying challenges such as ADHD or Sensory Processing difficulties.

On QEEG we often see excess activity across the Executive Network:

Neurofeedback to normailse these connections in the brain will help your child to self-regulate resulting in increased confidence at home, school and on the playground!

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